Fourteen years ago, I didn't know who the Wiggles were. I was clueless about the Doodlebops. I knew which Disney princess was which, but I didn't have their stories committed to memory. I never sat down to watch an episode of Wild Kratts. I never thought that I would watch a show called Little Einsteins. As a matter of fact, fourteen years ago, there were channels on tv that I would have never turned on.
Fourteen years ago, the color pink wasn't featured predominantly in my house. I didn't have Barbies (and Barbie movies), American Girl dolls, and Precious Moments figurines all over the place. I didn't have every ingredient on hand to make slime. I didn't have arts and craft supplies ready at a moments notice. I didn't panic if a certain bear wasn't found at bedtime.
Fourteen years ago, I didn't know about marching band and color guard. I didn't know about horse riding and swim lessons. I didn't know about 4H projects, fair entries, and all the work that it takes to get from an idea to a blue ribbon project. I didn't know about hand chime choirs, National History Day competitions, robotics meets, and poetry readings.
Fourteen years ago, I didn't know about sleepovers, movie marathons, and shopping with teenagers. I didn't know how much girls can giggle and eat. I didn't know what kind of mess that gets left behind after a sleepover. I didn't know how loud a music practice room can be when everyone is practicing a different song. I didn't know about working concessions stands and bonding with people over nachos with cheese.
Fourteen years ago, I didn't have any idea how much my life would be changing. I didn't know that I would be able to clean up vomit without getting sick myself. I didn't know that someone else's pain would make me cry. I didn't know that my mom's words would be coming out of my mouth. I didn't know that my heart could hold so much love.
Fourteen years ago it all changed. And I wouldn't have it any other way.
Thursday, February 27, 2020
Sunday, February 16, 2020
The Least of These
Jim and I went on a date Saturday night. We don't get out alone very often. D is generally with us when we do things. She is at an age where she is old enough to stay home alone, but in our house, she wouldn't actually be alone. Jim's parents live with us. Normally it would be great to have built in sitters for our family. When they lived with us six years ago, it worked out very well. But then changes happened.
Jim's mom has Alzheimer's. It is a terrible disease. She used to be a hard working, smart lady. This disease has taken so much from her. She has forgotten how to do many of the things that she did in the past. Jim's dad had a stroke three years ago. He used to be a very physical man. He worked hard and was very independent. The stroke has taken his independence and many of his physical abilities. They both get frustrated with what they can't do. And that frustration sometimes comes with loud, angry words from both of them. And that's why we don't go out alone very often...we don't want to leave her home alone in an atmosphere that can be unpleasant at times.
But Saturday night we had a date night. Luckily, the home front was peaceful for the evening. Jim and I went to a local community theater for dinner and a show with some friends. We saw the musical Godspell. It is based on the gospel of Matthew, in a groovy sort of way. Yes, I said groovy. It is from the early 70's, so think hippy and groovy. I mean, at one point Jesus and Judas do a soft shoe number. I doubt that many people come away with a need to look up Bible verses when they get home. But I did.
Jim's mom has Alzheimer's. It is a terrible disease. She used to be a hard working, smart lady. This disease has taken so much from her. She has forgotten how to do many of the things that she did in the past. Jim's dad had a stroke three years ago. He used to be a very physical man. He worked hard and was very independent. The stroke has taken his independence and many of his physical abilities. They both get frustrated with what they can't do. And that frustration sometimes comes with loud, angry words from both of them. And that's why we don't go out alone very often...we don't want to leave her home alone in an atmosphere that can be unpleasant at times.
But Saturday night we had a date night. Luckily, the home front was peaceful for the evening. Jim and I went to a local community theater for dinner and a show with some friends. We saw the musical Godspell. It is based on the gospel of Matthew, in a groovy sort of way. Yes, I said groovy. It is from the early 70's, so think hippy and groovy. I mean, at one point Jesus and Judas do a soft shoe number. I doubt that many people come away with a need to look up Bible verses when they get home. But I did.
"The King will reply, 'Truly I tell you,
whatever you did for one of the least of these
brothers and sisters of mine,
you did for me."
Matthew 25:40
Oh my, am I doing for the least of them, the ones who mentally or physically can't anymore? Am I doing it willingly, with a happy heart? Or am I doing things grudgingly because I should, because it's the right thing to do? Honestly, I try to do for others. I try to be helpful and show kindness. But in my home, with people who depend on me, am I showing kindness and love? I will very honestly tell you that the answer is no. I can give all the excuses in the world, but it doesn't make it right. I need to do better because He expects better from me. So, it is time for me to grow...to show love, to be kind and compassionate, to do for the least of these.
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