When people find out they are having a baby, many people start reading and researching how to raise a child. What to Expect When You are Expecting has been around for years. I had copy, and I referred to it often. After the baby is born, parents are flooded with advice. There are books about raising babies, toddlers, tweens, teens, and even college age students. If you even think about a child rearing topic, you can find books about it. Everyone will gladly share what they think is important about parenting. The one thing that no one told me was how important the tribe of moms would be in my life.
I became a parent late in life...I was 40, pretty close to 41, when I finally had D. Most of my friends where well past the newborn stage. In fact, a few of my friends were becoming grandparents while I was a new parent. To be honest, it was pretty lonely. My friends were past late-night feedings, dirty diapers, and bottles. Luckily, I found a website with other moms...who had kids the same ages as my kids. Yes, I was a little older, but online, age didn't matter. Those women on that website became my tribe of moms. If I had a question, one of them was either dealing with the same issue currently or had already handled something similar. They became my lifeline. That website is gone, but the relationships I made are still there...those mommas are still part of my tribe.
My mom tribe has changed over the years as well. Some of the moms I was close to when D was young are still part of my mom tribe. I have moms who are praying for my child daily, because that's what my tribe does for our children. We don't live near family. My momma tribe has in many ways filled in for the family that isn't nearby. I have people who will pick up D if Jim or I can't be there. I have people who can and do check on D when I ask. Today, two different mommas sent me photos of D because I wasn't at a school function. That's what a tribe of moms do for each other.
I am not close to all the moms that are part of my tribe. We might only talk occasionally, and that's okay. I know that if I needed help with D, I could count on so many of them. I try not to give advice to new parents unless they ask. We all have our own path in the parenting world. I will tell all moms out there this one thing... find a tribe of moms. They don't have to be your best friends, but they need to be someone that you can share stories with. Step out of your comfort zone. You need moms who are going through the same stages of life with you and your kiddo. Find a tribe of mommas...and be part of their tribe as well.
