Friday, October 14, 2011

One last piece of pie....

     10 years ago, I could barely turn on a computer.  5 years ago, I was new to online chatting.  Today, I go through withdrawals if I can't get online on a regular basis.  5 1/2 years ago, I was a new mom with lots of questions and very few resources or friends to turn to for support.  I discovered a local discussion board called IndyMoms.  I lurked for a while before I finally took the plunge and posted.  One comment lead to another and I was hooked.  I felt like a found a home with other women who had the same problems that I did.  My husband called IndyMoms, "The Cult" because I was so involved in the site.  Over time, there were many changes, like everything else in life.  Finally, the changes were just to much for me and I left the site.  It was hard, but it was time for me to move on. 

     I haven't been an active member in several months, but I never deleted my account.  I kept hoping that things would get better, but it didn't.  Now the site is shutting down and I am sad.  I went back for a last lurk and ended up posting....and I reconnected with a friend that I have missed.  That's what the site meant to me-connecting with other women that are now my friends.  I am closer to some of these women than my own family.  I feel like there is a death in my family.  I know that is dramatic, but IndyMoms has been so important to my life.

     Delainey and I had our first "playdate" with a group from the site.  Only one other mother/daughter showed up.  Delainey and I are still friends with that mother and daughter, Liz and T.  Because of that meeting, my family eventually found a church home.  I went to my first Mom's Night Out because I saw that it wasn't so scary to put myself out there.  The women that I met that night are still my friends.  I became more outgoing and more willing to reach out to other moms.  I joined a group of mom's over thirty (Cosmo Moms).  I have small group of women that are all over forty that I meet with monthly.  We call ourselves The Kitchen Girls.  I have experienced so many things because of the moms that I met on IndyMoms.

     Because of this local site, my family got to do so many things.  We attended private parties at the Children's Museum.  We went to a New Year's Eve party at the Indiana State Museum.  Delainey go to meet the Wiggles at a concert.  We learned about sprinkle parks, festivals, and kids eat free days!  I saw a flash mob downtown, got lost in a parade, and learned about luxurious homeless shelters.  We had fun!

     Through this site, I watched women support each other in life and in death.  We rallied around a member who battled breast cancer.  When she lost her fight, we rallied around her family.  At Christmas, we came together to provide gifts for families that needed help.  We made sure that our members had food for their families.  We "Rocked the Circle" by ringing bells for the Salvation Army.  We walked together at Race for the Cure and March of Dimes.

     The site wasn't perfect.  We fought, sometimes bitterly.  We had hurt feelings.  We talked about pie when things got to heated.  But mostly, we were family.

2 comments:

Eternal Lizdom said...

AMEN!

And I loved reading about how we met! It was at Pinheads! I remember it!

Anonymous said...

I love this! I think it awesome that you were able to put into words how this whole experience has felt, to you. I hope that we can all continue to forge friendships along our path and that we stay in touch as these kids grow up and leave the nest. I have a feeling that we are going to need each other more at the end of our parenting than we ever do now! I'm so glad to have met you through the site!