Kindness with a K

      Last night, I attended a celebration of life for a young man. I listened to his family and friends share stories of him. I thought about the times that I was around him. He was part of my daughter's band family (and by extension my band family). He was part of my work family. The overwhelming take-away from this young man is kindness. 

     I saw his kindness firsthand during band. He never let anyone carry a heavy load. When D had a load of flags to bring home one evening, they were brought to my car by this young man...because, according to him, D didn't need to carry them alone. When the marching band was headed to their state competition, he baked them cookies and sent them an encouraging letter. He couldn't go with them because he was getting ready for a cancer treatment. He thought of others instead of himself. 

     I learned that this kind young man told his close friends about his illness himself. He was worried about how they would react, rather than about himself. I learned that he made special treat for teachers when he found out what they liked. He made cookies for the nurses at the hospital to thank them for taking care of him. He made gluten free treats when he heard about allergies. I learned that he worried about others so much more than he worried about himself. 

     Konnar with a K was all about kindness. I don't know why he had to leave this life so young. I don't have the words to comfort my grieving daughter and their friends. I do know how I am going to remember him. I am going to try to become kinder than I am. I am going to do little things to bring joy to others. I am going to practice kindness with a K.

Two days....

      This past Tuesday was the last day of Mardi Gras, which literally means Fat Tuesday. At our house, we celebrate Fat Tuesday with pancakes and bacon.  I serve our meal on my fancy plate.

Some years I make cupcakes that are reminiscent of a king cake, complete with a plastic baby hidden in one of the cupcakes. That's all that we do to celebrate this festival of gluttony. It's the last hurrah before the fasting and sacrifice of Lent. It's silly and a something that we have done for years in our family. It has no deep meaning attached to it, just something fun for my family.

     And then comes Wednesday...Ash Wednesday, otherwise known as the first day of Lent. Lent commemorates the 40 days that Jesus spent fasting in the desert. It leads us to the celebration of Easter. When D was young, they would often tell me that there was good news and bad news about Easter. The bad news was that Jesus died, but the good news was that He came back to life. I remember the look of joy when D told me that story. Until Easter Sunday, Lent is a time of reflection and sacrifice. Some people give up things like soda...I've done that and then I go right back to drinking it again when the season is over. Other people add in extra Bible study for the season. I have tried that, but I struggle to do my regular devotions...adding in more would just overwhelm me. This year I am being called to do something completely out of my wheelhouse....

     I was having a conversation with some friends the other day about how they are feeling as if they can't focus. They feel that they are being pulled in so many directions and are struggling to get things accomplished. That same day, I had a conversation with another group of friends. They are just struggling to feel anything at all. Or they are overcome with emotions...sadness, despair, exhaustion. I talked with another friend who is having parenting struggles. I have been in all of those situations at one time or another, but right now, I feel that I am in a pretty good place (yes, I know, that could change at any moment). 

     One of the groups I was with prayed together. It was a strong prayer and many of us were moved to tears. I was teary, I had goosebumps, but I also felt the Holy Spirit with us in that room. After that meeting, I went to our chapel. My pastor prayed as he put ashes on my forehead in the shape of a cross. Again, I felt the Holy Spirit with me. An idea began to form in my heart, before I could give it words. And by this morning, I had words for that idea that the Holy Spirit planted in me. 

I am being called to pray for my friends specifically this season. I pray for them always, but I am feeling strongly that I need to be praying extra...I don't know why I am being called to this. I don't know what I need to be praying for, but He knows. I am not a warrior when it comes to prayer, but I am going to become one during this Lenton season. I hope to get up just a little earlier and spend focused time...time when I lift up my friends. 

Two days....so completely different. A day that celebrates gluttony, parties, and revelry. And a day that starts down a path that while somber, leads us to the best day ever. And while we are going down that path, I will be praying...praying for my family and friends, for our country, for the world. And if you need prayer, send me a message so that I can lift you as well.

Doing New Things

      I just finished a new thing. I am not ready to say what it is just yet, but dang it was hard. I don't like doing new things. Anyone who knows me knows that...but I'm getting better at it.  This was really hard. I struggled. I overthought every step that I made. I cried more than once. I felt like a failure often. But I kept going. Even when I wanted to give up, I didn't.

     While I was doing this new thing, I let other things in life slide. Jim and Delainey didn't get many meals made at home. There was a lot of fast food and eating out. I leaned on them both to keep the house going...and just as I knew they would, they handled it. I leaned on friends for prayer when the struggle became overwhelming. I had friends talking me down when I was in panic mode. I have a village surrounding me, and they were definitely holding me up during this time!

     I have another big thing coming up soon, but I have a break. During that break, I am going to breath and take some time for myself. I am going to spend some extra time with my family, because they deserve my time! I am going to plan just a little more for the next big thing because I know what I am looking forward to with the next thing. 

     My biggest take away from this big thing, is that I can do it. I am stronger than I think that I am. New things will always be intimidating, but they can lead to better things ahead!

**and just to be vaguely clear, this new hard thing is not bad. We are all healthy, I just have new things on the horizon. 

     

Prayer

      I absolutely believe in the power of prayer. I have seen prayer do amazing things. I am not the best at formal praying. I'm more of a casual conversation type of prayer person. And praying out loud...that's rough, but I am trying. I am also trying to use more formal prayer time. In March, my church is planning a daylong workshop on prayer that Jim and I are planning to attend. I can't wait to learn more about how prayer can deepen my faith.

     Today at work, I sent a message to a friend to let them know I was praying for them. They haven't asked for prayers. I don't see any indication that they have anything going on in life that they need extra prayers. They were on my mind and heart, so I said a prayer for them, and I let them know I was praying for them. And when I had free time today, I continued to pray for them. This afternoon, it occurred to me that I can continue to pray for them this week. I can pray over their job, their family, the entire person. So that is what I am going to do this week.

    Then it occurred to me...if I can do this for one friend one week, why can't I do the same thing every week? There is no reason that it won't work...unless I slack off. But I really want to do this. I want to create a prayer circle...network...something. I am sure that this is nothing new, but it is for me. I am going to continue with my usual prayers, but I really want to focus on one person for one week at a time. I am sure that God will provide the person to me. And I don't know if I will say anything to that person, but I feel like it gives me some accountability. 

     Will you join me in praying specifically for someone this week? You don't have to tell them. You don't have to tell anyone else. The One hearing the prayers will know that you are praying. And you never know who needs your prayers.

The word for 2022...

   

  Some years, I search really hard for a word, and it works perfectly. Other years the word comes to me easily. This year was a combination of things. I have been searching for my word, but nothing felt right. I decided to do a search for words and create kept surfacing. Then a Bible verse popped into my mind. I don't have many verses committed to memory, so I decided that this was one of those nudges from God that I am trying to watch for in my life.

CREATE

1: to make or produce (something): to cause (something new) to exist

2: to cause (a particular situation) to exist

3: to produce (something new, such as a work of art) by using your talents and imagination

    

    The third meaning really speaks to me...to produce by using MY talents. I have several dreams for the upcoming year that I hope to better utilize my talents. There are a few people who see talents in me that I struggle to see, so I hope to develop those as well. I don't look at myself as particularly creative, but there are many ways to create in life. I hope to explore them this year.

    I am going to use a verse to help guide me along the way in the upcoming year as well. This is the verse that came to me as I was searching for my word. I pray that I listen, learn, and stay faithful along my journey.

    

 

Another year ending...

      2021 is almost over, just over 24 hours are left in the year. Once again, I can look back at all the things I didn't do, or I can look at all the things that I did do. There was a time that I would focus on what I didn't do, but I am trying to give myself grace and focus on the positive things!

     I was asked by a friend to be part of an amazing weekend called The Great Banquet. I said yes easily and eagerly. Then that same friend asked me to speak at that weekend. I said yes, but only because I prayed long and hard about saying yes.  I cannot say enough about the weekend. If you need to spend some time with Jesus, ask me about The Great Banquet, I will be happy to make sure that you are part of a weekend soon.

     We, Jim and I, paid down some debt that we have had. We aren't done, but we have made some great strides in becoming more financially secure. 

     We took vacations!  Jim, Delainey, and I spent a week with friends at their home in Alabama. It was wonderful to be away from home, but it was even better to see our friends. We went camping...okay, we stayed in a beautiful, non-rustic cabin...but we had friends who were camping at the same time and place. D took a friend, Jim and I got to visit with two of our favorite people, and we had a great time. D and I took a girl's trip to Alabama with a friend (and her husband tagged along, but we still called it our girl trip). We had a lovely condo on the water and didn't want to leave. D and I took a road trip to visit my mom...and a day side trip to Michigan as well.

     I said yes to several things lately. I am serving on a few teams at church. Some of them are outside of my comfort zone, but it feels right to say yes.

     I have taken a big leap recently. I am not ready to share much but let's just say that God has been nudging me for a long time. Recently He stopped nudging and smacked me in such a way that I know I am finally listening, obeying, and following.

    My word for 2021 is willing. I have tried to do things outside of my comfort zone with a willing spirit. Hopefully I have succeeded more than I have failed. As I get ready to head into a new year, I hope that I keep giving myself grace, keep focusing on the positive, and stay willing.

Time Flies

 Where has the time gone?  Fifteen years ago, I was heading to the hospital early in the morning.  Jim and I watched 'The Quiet Man'.  I visited with my mom.  We listened to Jimmy Buffet.  And at 9:02. Dr. Gates announced that Delainey had finally arrived.  That long day has turned into very short years!

When she was little she was sweet and sassy, determined to do things herself, but she still wanted us by her side.  She had a temper, but it didn't last long.  She had a heart of gold.  She loved to dance and be silly.  Her Pink Bear was always with her.  She loved music and Barbie movies.

Today, she is still the same girl.  She is still sweet and sassy.  I worry that her sassiness will get her in trouble, but it seems that she knows just how sassy she can be!  She is such a determined person.  She wanted a room make over.  Jim and I don't like painting, so she spent yesterday painting her bedroom.  She still has a temper, but it still doesn't last long...she has a forgiving heart.  She still spins and dances at home, but I don't think that she does much public dancing.  Pink Bear...let's just say she's looking very loved after fifteen years.  Music is her passion although Barbie movies are a thing of the past.

I am not one to cry over the past.  I have loved the past fifteen years of watching my girl grow.  There were some rough times, but we got through them.  I am sure that there will be rough patches in the future. I enjoy spending time with her, because not only do I love her, but I genuinely like her!  I am looking forward to what the next year brings in her life.  I try to remember that the days are long, but the years are short.  On  Delainey's birthday, that seems more true than ever.