Share Your Story!

     "Tell it to your children,

and let your children tell it their children,

and their children to the next generation."

Joel 1:3

     A few weeks ago, I attended the 2015 Indiana Annual Conference of the United Methodist Church as a representative of my church.  The theme for the conference was "Share Your Story".  Several people shared their stories with everyone.  Stories of new churches starting, stories of ordination of new pastors, stories of retiring pastors, stories of why we were at Conference.  We were all encouraged to share our stories with each other.  We got stickers to wear that say "I have a story to tell".  Of course, if you had that sticker on, it meant the someone might ask you what's your story!

     I overheard several people saying the same thing that I was thinking.  Do I have a story?  

     Jim and I  have been watching the TV miniseries called AD and are attending a Bible study based on the show. One of the featured people is Saul.  Saul has a story.  He once persecuted the early Christians.  One the way to Damascus, he spoke with Jesus and was blinded.  After three days, his sight was restored and he become filled with the Holy Spirit.  Saul spread the story of Jesus throughout many places.  Thar's a story!  Another "big" story is the one that Lazarus had to tell.  Lazarus died.  Jesus wept at the death of Lazarus.  And then Jesus raised him from the dead.  What a story!  Those men, they had BIG stories to tell.  

     The Bible is filled with people who have stories, really big stories.  But there are also small stories that are just as important.  People who lived their lives doing what God wanted them to do.  Sharing the ordinary day to day things just like we do now.  There are moments in life that we can look at and say, yep, that was all God.  It's those God-moments that are part of our story that we need to share.Those moments that you don't think are a big deal, but might be a big deal to someone else.

     I have a friend who shares of abuse that she suffered as a child.  Another who shares her story of addiction.  Another friend who shares her journey to find wellness in her life.  Another who shares his struggle through the loss of a loved one.  Another who shares the story of having a special needs child. Those people share their stories so that others will know they are not alone.  They share their stories to inspire others.  They share their stories to inform others.  They share their stories to connect with others. They share their stories to help them heal.  

     We all have a story to share...so what's your story?

12 Years

     Twelve years ago today, I began a new chapter in my life once again.  I was getting ready to get married.  I really never thought that I would get married a second time.  I believe that marriage is forever.  My first marriage ended...I tried to "fix" it, but marriage takes two, one person can't fix a broken marriage.  I decided at that point, I was done with marriage.  I truly believe that everyone should be married once, but that was my limit.   And then I met Jim....

     I met Jim at work.  It wasn't love at first sight...although I can remember our first conversation (not romantic at all, he asked me to help him get carts from the parking lot).  He was truly a nice guy.  We talked and got to know each other.  I respected the importance that he placed on his family.  He showed me pictures of his boys.  He was respectful when he spoke of his ex-wife.  He was a hard worker.  I began to look forward to our conversations.  And then one day we went to lunch together.

     Our lunch wasn't at a romantic location...seriously, Wendy's.  We each had a jr bacon cheeseburger (he had two), fries, and a coke.  But that lunch changed the course of our friendship.  We both knew that there was more to come.  We began to talk more, share more of our lives together, spend more time together.  And less than a year after that first lunch, we went to a little wedding chapel in Greenfield and got married.  We vowed before God, our family, and our friends to love each other through all that life brings us.

     Our marriage hasn't always been easy.  We have had ups and downs, times where we weren't sure that we would be together, but we have fought through those times.  We have been through a huge location change that was so hard on me...I am sure that it was really rough on Jim dealing with me during that time.  We have been through Jim's cancer.  We have the blessing of a daughter.  We are watching the boys grow into young men starting their own adventures in life.  We have the simple moments each day.

     The last twelve years have been a partnership of two people committed to making a life together.  It is a journey each day.  Our marriage is a choice that we made then, a choice that we make now, every single day.  It is not perfect...but there is no one that I would rather be imperfect with than Jim!  I am looking forward to each new day of our journey together.

50---My Way

     Yesterday I turned 50.  I have been setting such high expectations for this milestone birthday.  My other milestone birthdays have just been like any other days.  When I turned 21, I didn't have any friends nearby to go to bars.  Instead, my best friend's parents fixed me dinner and took me out to the local watering hole for my first legal drink.  30 was just plain awful.  I literally could not say the word, instead I turned 20-10.  Seriously...and that's all I have to say about that.  40 was better than 30 (it would have to be), but I was still mentally and emotionally recovering from a miscarriage earlier in the year.  I have no idea what I did that day.  40 turned out to be a pretty good year for me as that was the year that Delainey was born.  In my mind, I deserved to have an memorable 50th.

     I started comparing my turning 50 to other people turning 50.  I know people who had huge parties, others who went to fancy events, and still others who went on grand vacations to celebrate.  I thought that was what I wanted.  But then I realised, that truly isn't me.  I don't want a party where I am the center of attention.  I am not a fancy person...I would have to buy a new outfit for a fancy occasion.  And a grand vacation isn't in our budget this year.  And that's when I realised that the important thing for me about turning 50 was to be able to spend time with my family.  So that's what we did.

     I had a marvelous day!  I woke up and did some laundry.  I fixed breakfast for my family.  And then like a herd of turtles, we were off!  We spent the day at Lincoln State Park.  We stopped and bought some groceries for the day...ham, cheese, fruit, snacks, and drinks.  As we stopped by the picnic area, we spotted a doe and her fawn, just watching from the edge of the woods.   Then we headed out for our hike.  It wasn't a long or hard hike, just under 2 miles, but this out of shape family enjoyed the walk.  Jim decided to climb to the top of the fire tower while D and I cheered him on from the bench.  By the time we got back to the car, we decided to take a drive around the park with the AC on to cool off.

     Jim brought his fishing gear, so he set off for a little quiet time to find a good fishing hole!  Jim loves to fish and doesn't do it nearly often enough.  D and I changed into our swimsuits and went to the beach area for some swim time.  D loved it.  She had a chance to practice some of her new moves that she has been learning at swim lessons.  The water was cool, but after our hike, it felt heavenly.  I am more of a wader in lake water, so that's what I did.  D and I found some small shells to add to our family collection of shells. After a quick shower and change, we found Jim and decided to visit the Lincoln Boyhood National Memorial.

     The Memorial was a nice place.  We went in backwards and were tired, so it didn't seem cohesive to us.  After visiting the actual visitor center last, what we saw made more sense.  The state park has a very cool plaza that would, in my mind, fit in better at the national memorial, but who I am to judge!  D did get sworn in as a junior ranger after she completed an activity booklet about Lincoln.  It was a quick trip for us, but had we not been tired, would have been more interesting.

     We had dinner in Santa Claus, IN (Frosty's...good food and free mini-golf) and headed for home...the Predmore way, off the beaten path.  Jim programed our GPS for the shortest distance, which always takes us the winding, interesting way.  We drove through Ferdinand, which has a monastery and some pretty cool architecture.  We have decided that it could be worth a visit some day.  We continued down country roads that twisted and turned, all the while watching to be sure no critters ran into the car (we missed a fox that ran out in front of us).  We laughed and unwound from our day.

     I turned 50 yesterday, and I did it my way.  I didn't think about how other people celebrated.  I didn't worry about what others would think.  That's how I hope to live out the next year.  I want to spend my time not worrying what others think.  I want to enjoy my family not comparing us to other families.  And above all else, I want to live my life pleasing God.

Celebration Week!

     It is Celebration Week at our house.  We are celebrating very differently than what has become our norm.  This is usually the week we reserve for our "big" vacation of the year.  Last year, we went to Maine, a few years ago we celebrated our week in Disney, one year a cabin in Wisconsin.  This year, we are not on vacation this week.  I am not sure that I like being home for Celebration Week, but the celebrations will happen where ever we are!
   
     The first event we celebrate is Jim's birthday.  This year, we both worked on his birthday.  I feel bad about that.  There wasn't much of a party...just a homemade meal (Mexican) with some beer, cupcakes, and a few gifts.  Jim is such an awesome man and he deserves a huge celebration of his birth.  He works hard to support his family in a demanding job.  There aren't words to say that could ever express how much I love and appreciate him.  If everyone who loved and respected Jim all gathered together on his birthday, June 3 would be one of the biggest party days ever.

     The second event in our week long celebration is June 5, which is my birthday.  Normally, I am pretty low key about my birthday, but this year I have been pretty demanding.  I have wanted my 50th (yes, 50) to be special.  And yesterday, I realized that what I want most is just to spend the day with Jim and Delainey doing the normal things we always do together.  We are heading to a new to us state park for a day of hiking, picnicking and just being together.  I am looking forward to the quiet of nature, our relaxing together, and sweating (okay, maybe not sweating).

     The last event that we will celebrate happens Sunday, which is our 12th anniversary.  It's hard to believe that twelve years ago, we made our vows before God, family, and friends.  Things haven't always been easy, we have been through more than I ever thought possible, but we are still here, still together, and stronger than ever.  We haven't made any plans other than attending church Sunday morning, and that's okay.  Sunday is usually a day that we relax at home and get ready for the upcoming week.  I am hoping we can get something special from the farmer's market Saturday to fix for our anniversary meal Sunday.  As long as I can spend the day with Jim, it's all good!

     Jim and I as individuals are far from perfect.  Our marriage, wonderful as it is, is far from perfect.  We are happy, healthy, and glad to have made it through another year, older, wiser, and still standing.  Celebration Week this year looks different than usual, but there is still plenty to celebrate!

Missing the Party...Again

     In the fall of 1984 I packed my things, left home, and moved into a college dorm.  I fell in love with college life.  I loved living in the dorm...there was always someone around if you didn't want to be alone, no matter what time of day.  I was lucky enough to make some friends who lived in the dorm next to mine.  As soon as there was an opening, I moved into that dorm...Schmidt Hall.

     I spent all four years of college living in that dorm.  I thought of moving into other dorms, but Schmidt was my home away from home.  I never even really considered living off campus like many other college students.  I was content in the dorm.  When I got up early on Sunday morning, I had someone to watch wrestling with downstairs in the lobby.  If I was bored, there was always someone doing something crazy like rearranging the lobby furniture into an architectural model.  I went on a canoe trip with my dorm-mates.  That's where I learned that you can brush your teeth and rinse with beer.  I wouldn't advise that, but when you take more beer than water on an overnight canoe trip, you have to do something.  I went with a group of dorm friends to King's Island to celebrate when one of our group turned 21.  That same friend just recently turned 50.

     Some of those dorm friends have been part of my life on a  regular basis since those days. I have reconnected with many more of them through Facebook.  We have been together in sickness and health, marriages and divorces.  We have been together through the birth of our children.  One of Delainey's most prized possessions, her blanket we call Mrs. Hannon, came from one of those friends...it was a roundabout connection through Schmidt, but the connection was there.  We have watched our children grow and have seen a second generation attend (and graduate from) Ball State, although none have lived in Schmidt.

     Why on earth would I be talking about my college dorm friends  today?  Well, many of them are gathering today for the Annual Race Party.  The excuse for the party is the Indy 500, although it really is a side show.  There is no cable or satellite tv, so watching the race  is sketchy at best.  After the race, there will be a rubber duck race or two in the river behind the hosts house.  There will be lots of laughter, catching up, and reminiscing about our college days. Children will be playing, canoes and kayaks will be out, people will be eating and drinking and being merry.

     And I won't be there.  Again. I now live 4 hours from the party.  Jim has to work.  And this month has been crazy busy with so many things going on between school, church, and 4H activities.  So, I will wait to see pictures and updates about the party on Facebook.  I will be there in spirit, but not in body.  I will start planning today to make it to the party next year and hope that life doesn't get so busy that once again I will miss the party.

Part of Getting Older?

     My body is hurting.  I have been having massive pains in my shoulder that are causing numbness in my arm and hand.  My other hand/wrist is aching from carpel tunnel.  My hips ache in the mornings.  My hair is still falling out and I have hot flashes.  I am tired.  And my weight, well, let's just say that it isn't pretty right now.  I have been told that this is all just part of getting old.  I refuse to age this way!

     After a week of pain, Jim called his chiropractor for me.  The doctor did an exam.  There was no trigger for any of my aches and pains, just a gradual building of stress in my body. I haven't been eating right at all....fast food, chocolate, and my weakness, coke have been part of my diet for a while again.  Meal planning has gone out the window.  I have never been a big exercise person, but I at least would go for walks.  Now I come home and collapse on the couch.  I took vitamins and supplements for a while, but I would forget so often that I just gave up the whole process.

     The doctor and I talked.  Until my shoulder is better, I will be seeing him twice a week (hopefully only 2 or three weeks since my insurance doesn't see chiropractic care as important).  I have some stretches to do for my shoulder to help ease the pain, along with Biofreeze, ice. and naproxin.  Exercise needs to become a daily part of my life.  I need to think about the foods that go into my body.  And  I need to research what supplements I should take to make sure that my body stops hurting and starts healing.

     For me, it's all about getting balance back into my life.  I am not going to be someone who blames everything on getting old.  Yes, things change in our bodies as we age, but we can make those changes positive ones.  I am going to greet fifty with a plan in place for exercising and filling my body with the right things for a change.  I plan on being fifty and fabulous!  Now excuse me while I go put some Biofreeze on my shoulder!

Balance 2015

     My word for 2014 keeps finding me.  It just won't let me go.  I was shopping with the family and saw a bracelet that says balance.  I bought it.  A friend gave me a bracelet with water from Mt Everest and mud from the Dead Sea in separate beads...the highest and lowest points on earth.  It is to remind me to stay humble and and hopeful...to stay balanced.

     About a year ago, several things happened that threw me off balance and I am not sure that I have ever fully regained that balance that I was working toward.  It didn't seem right to reuse my word last January, but in hindsight, I was not done with the journey to a more balanced life.  So I am reclaiming the word balance for 2015.  Some day, I will be ready to simplify life, but not right now.  Right now, it's back to finding my balance.

     Balance...finding the right mix of work and home, finding time for me, finding time for Jim and I, finding family time, finding time for God and increasing my faith, finding my path to healthy eating and exercise (I really hate the E word), finding the balance of giving and saving.  

     This is my journey for the rest of 2015.  It all starts with baby steps, wobbly little baby steps that slowly but surely become more balanced as the year goes on.