Parenting Fail...

     Last night was a terrible night.  It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad night, to quote one of my favorite children's book.  Delainey was in a mood and I was in no mood for her mood.  I finally was done and put myself in time out for the night.  Jim took over and I think that they had a good night.  It was one of those nights that I don't want to repeat any time soon.  I was not the parent that I want to be, the parent that Delainey needs, or the the parent that God intends me to be.

     This morning I read my devotional and one of the verses was from Isaiah:

"Yet, O Lord, You are our Father;

We are the clay and You are the Potter.

We all are the work of Your hand"

Isaiah 64:8

This became my prayer all day...that I allow Him to shape me into the parent. the person, that He wants me to become.  I spent my drive to work thinking about all the things that went wrong last night.  I spent my time thinking about ways to correct the problems that happened last night.  And I feel like I have some ideas about how to make our evenings better.

     The first thing that needs to happen is that we all need more sleep in our house.  We all get cranky when we are tired.  D has been staying up past bedtime (8 is her normal bedtime) and still going to camp at the same time each morning.  I have been staying up until 10 or 11 each night...not a late night for a person who gets to sleep until 6 or so, but I get up at "the butt crack of dawn"...3 am.  So from now on, bed time is prompt, for both of us.  Jim is another story...he has issues sleeping, so he sleeps when he can.  

     The next issue is that we both have been spending to much time with our favorite screens (tv her, computer me) when we should be spending time together.  We are leaving chores undone, which stresses me out and makes me cranky.  So, tv and computer time are going to be limited.  I plan on buying a timer for the house so that when it rings, we are done.  I have also thought of some fun activities that we can do together, rather than stare at the screens.  I am also going to make a list of things that need to be done around the house daily.  All three of us work better when we have lists in front of us, so lists it is.  

     The last thing that I realized today is that sometimes there will be bad days.  I will fail some days, it is what I learn from those failing days that will make me a better parent, a better person.  Hopefully there are more stellar days than failing days.  And even in those days that I fail, there are moments of joy...yesterday we had a wonderful dinner and enjoyed the company of each other.  I need to remember that I don't need to be perfect, I just need to be the best parent. the best person,  that I can be. 

     I am clay...and His hands are molding me each day.